Ashley Williams (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
brbvirmire) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
singularityderp2011-12-10 03:40 pm
brbvirmire) wrote in singularityderp2011-12-10 03:40 pm
suddenly, feelings. thousands of them!
THE MEME: THE GAME
This has been going around Plurk anyway and it's been a few months so why not?
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☆ Ramble like the wind.
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Aradia Megido
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Aradia is more than 0k with Karkat! she even called him a 'friend' while she was a robot. I think she respects him as a leader and is more than willing to let him have that role. by now, she knows about his blood color thanks to timeline/dream bubble shenanigans, but that hasn't changed her opinion of him. she's never been one to care about the hemospectrum, being bottom-of-the-barrel blood color and all.
in Sing, she's glad to see him doing well(???)(and panicking about pregnancy) but HAHA OH WOW yeah you can bet she'll be coming to him with all kinds of Tender Feelings Problems. she figures that Karkat is the resident expert on Tender Feelings, so she will, with complete seriousness, ask for and put his advice to use. she just has a lot of feelings, okay.
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just. so many feelings?? adding onto what I was saying in my plurk the other day abubububu
WHY HAVE SO MANY SAD THINGS HAPPENED BETWEEN THESE TWO...... okay. I think one of the worst parts was that Aradia died so sad and so shocked, her last memory before dying having been seeing Sollux right before he blasted her (THAT SMILE SHE MAKES BEFORE SHE REALIZES WHAT HE'S GOING TO DO IS THE SADDEST THING... oh god i gave myself a sad), and then she was a ghost and every single bit of capacity she'd had for emotion was gone. the worst part, for her, about having been dead was knowing that Sollux was hurting but not being able to remember why or how to care. she knew that she wanted to be hurting for him too, but she just couldn't, because she simply forgot how to. I think her dying screwed both of them up pretty badly, but Sollux worst of all, because Aradia's emotions over the matter were taken away from her. as a robot, she really struggled before she died to even say the simple words that she did. even without real emotions, she still wanted him to know that she was sorry and that she'd smile for him if she could. she didn't anticipate coming back to life, either, but now that she is... WELP.
basically, she didn't have any feelings at all for so long and now I think it's a lot like these floodgates have opened, and she's having a lot of feelings about everything. Aradia's having trouble with all of these renewed emotions, because it's been a while since she's had any. BASICALLY SHE... IS TRYING TO REMEMBER HOW TO BE A REAL GIRL....... lmfao oh my god Aradia uh ANYWAY.
she's always cared about Sollux a lot, and here in Sing she really just sees it as an opportunity to pick up where they left off, even though they're both such different people now. it's immensely relieving to her to be herself again and to have Sollux there and not half-dead. she does love him and she has for ages, given the way she used to feel about him before her death, but she doesn't really want to be selfish about it, if that makes sense? if she ever felt like she was making Sollux unhappy, she would let him go. she really, sincerely just wants him to be happy. she feels like he deserves it after all of the shit he's gone through, and if he's happy being with her, then that brings her an enormous amount of joy, and she's really grateful for this second chance between them. I think they have a lot of work ahead of them, but they were already such good friends/flushcrushes before her death, and while I think what happened between them distanced them a lot, it didn't weaken the bond they have to one another.
they are just two nerdy kids in nerdy kid love okay. tl;dr BABIES come here sollux let aradia give you awkward kisses that are actually not going to happen for a while because eridan is watching......
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tl;dr NOT YOUR SMOOCHBOT STOP THAT
Aradia just. doesn't really know how to feel about Equius. she's never had any blackrom feelings for anyone before, and then he went and gave her a robot body and tried to force her to love him and then SUDDENLY, SPADES. she was just so angry at him that any attraction she might have felt before her death just sort of twisted into hatehatehate.
except she's not black for him at all once she's mellowed out and now especially when she's alive again. so that leaves her in a really awkward place. she's still a little bit angry for what he tried to do to her, but she's stuck in a weird place where she's also forced to be thankful to him for helping her out in the first place. the robotic shell he built her gave her the form she needed to be able to play Sgrub properly. without it, she'd have probably failed her duties. it's also said that it amplified her psychic powers and was one of the only reasons she was able to stave off the Vast Glub from the Black King. and then there's the whole deal of Equius did it because he genuinely cared about her. yeah, it was in a really creepy, obsessive, misguided way, but he gave enough of a shit about her to try to help her. and that would have been fine if it weren't for that new heart- and, to be honest, I don't think she's too happy about having been given blue blood, either. when she was alive, she viewed all highbloods as snobs. growing up at the bottom of the hemospectrum was hard for her, so she mistrusts them naturally. but Equius makes her feel so uncertain about everything.
she does seem to have reached some sort of peace with his actions, though, because in 'Seek the highb100d' Nepeta talks about having dreamed about god tier Aradia and says 'she was so happy, just like she used to be, and she said she would s33 you soon!'. so I can only assume that her intention was/is to visit Equius after his death in his dream bubble, because what's the point of holding onto resentment? so that's her perspective in Sing, too, even if it's so frustrating to explain to him/Sollux/others. she really, really wants to give Equius a chance. the most she can offer now is her friendship- which, honestly, she feels like is a pretty big step for the two of them, given all the problems laid out on the table.
despite being wary, she cares about Equius, and she'd really hate to see him crushed. she just doesn't know how to reconcile her feelings for Sollux with this strange sense of wanting to understand Equius. she's definitely not black for him, but she has no idea what she feels, really. time will tell.
Re: Aradia Megido
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