singularityderp | DATING SIM MEME

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DATING SIM MEME

DATING SIM MEME

♥ You are in Generic Anime High School Land in Generic Town Japan! You all have ADORABLE uniforms! And your goal is to... well. It's a dating sim. ♥
♥Each thread-starter is the protagonist of their thread. That is, they have to make all the HARD CHOICES. ♥
♥ Each responder should supply a list of four options for the thread starter to choose from, as they are the ~~victims~~ potential dates! ♥
♥ Obviously people can switch up roles in different threads ♥
♥ RIDICULOUSNESS 8| ♥

♥ YAAAAAAAAAY ♥

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Well, if that's way you really feel, I could just watch you fall. You'll probably break something. Might hurt.

_{[He scratches his chin. He's still looking way too amused for his own good.]}

Can't say I've ever ridden a musclebeast, though. Or seen one for that matter. What do they look like?

_{[Yes, he's being deliberately obtuse.]}

A. Continue your SHOUTFEST MONOLOGUE to soothe your EGO at the cost of your HEALTH.
B. Cease your MONOLOGUE and grudgingly accept assistance.
C. Flail helplessly in an fruitless attempt to boost yourself back through the window.
D. Ride his musclebeast, oh yeah.

>D. Ride his musclebeast, oh yeah.

[What musclebeast? That was a figure of speech, moron. Garrus obviously didn't ride in on a musclebeast! Besides, you're STUCK IN A WINDOW. There will be no riding to be had. Not that you can ride PROVERBIAL MUSCLEBEASTS anyway, because they're fucking proverbial.]

Fuck you, that's what they look like.

>C. Flail helplessly in a fruitless attempt to boost yourself back through the window.

[You attempt to BOOST YOURSELF BACK THROUGH YOUR WINDOW, but the endeavor proves to be FRUITLESS. You mostly end up FLAILING HELPLESSLY. You're running out of options.]

>B. Cease your MONOLOGUE and grudgingly accept assistance.

[Well, fine. It's not because you can't do it yourself or anything or because you appreciate Garrus's good intentions and you're basically just an ass or anything, though. You could totally get out of this yourself without breaking your chitinous plates. This is just easier.]

A-are you going to help me or not, you gogdamn useless shit of a felchwit!?

Well, since you asked so nicely....

_{[He laughs again, shakes his head and then reaches up to try and steady you. Unfortunately, this may prove a bit awkward.]}

Hold on... this might be a bit difficult.

_{[He gives you a tug, trying to EASE you down. It will probably end in an UNDIGNIFIED HEAP though.]}

A. Make his job more difficult, just to spite him.
B. End up in an UNDIGNIFIED HEAP atop Garrus.
C. Intentionally FALL on your WOULD-BE RESCUER in order to facilitate an awkward/romantic/hateful moment.
D. Get distracted by his PIERCING EYES.

>A. Make his job more difficult, just to spite him.

[You decide to make this as difficult as possible just to make Garrus miserable. After all, you're all for SPITEFUL VENGEANCE, often disregarding how PETTY AND IMMATURE it is. Your urge to spite grows in NERVOUS REFLEX from the feel of this random idiot YOU DEFINITELY DON'T GIVE ANY SHITS ABOUT trying to ease you down, and so you decide to kick at him. You scream about how he's obviously doing it all wrong. What a wily little ingrate you are!

Unfortunately, the CONTINUOUS THOUGH SLIGHT MOTION of your SENSELESS CHILDISH FLAILING, you end up HELPING YOURSELF DOWN into an UNDIGINIFIED HEAP atop Garrus. This wasn't at all intentional, nor was it in order to facilitate awkward feelings. But no less, while participating in an embarrassing ALIEN HEAPATHON, you find yourself distracted by his PIERCING EYES. The awkward feelings are there.

In addition to causing a chain reaction of clusterfuckery by unintentionally plowing through each of your options, you punch YOUR SAVIOR in the face.]

_{[Oh, holy Hell, that was a clusterfuck. You really made a mess of things, didn't you? Regardless of all your previous failings, you're new a part of an ALIEN HEAPATHON and as a result, you lose EGO. Of course, those PIERCING EYES might be distracting you too much for you to notice. YOUR SAVIOR rubs the spot where your fist connected with his face, glaring.]}

Ow! Damn, what was that for? I was trying to help.

_{[He tries to sit up, but you're sort of on top of him. He settles for propping himself up on his elbows with a snort.]}

This is the thanks I get for being a decent guy.

A. Command him to CEASE WHINING immediately. He should be grateful that you allowed him to BREAK YOUR FALL.
B. STARE DEEPLY into his eyes and experience a MOMENT.
C. Punch YOUR SAVIOR in the face again, just for good measure.
D. Stick it in.

[All of these options are really enticing ever since you decided to put OPTION D on your blacklist, but you need to stop your SILLY SHENANIGANS and just pick ONE OPTION.]

>A. Command him to CEASE WHINING immediately. He should be grateful that you allowed him to BREAK YOUR FALL.

[You try to go for option A, but the GAME MECHANICS force you to execute OPTION B. The MOMENT you experience is mortifying at best, as it stirs more AWKWARD FEELINGS. This game is hideous and terrible. You are paralyzed by its spell.]

—Uh.

_{[Oh, God. YOUR SAVIOR looks back and apparently he is also experiencing AWKWARD FEELINGS. Especially since the two of you are still in an ALIEN HEAPATHON. In, fact the two factors combined are enough to push this into a CROWNING MOMENT OF AWKWARD. Your EGO takes a massive hit.]}

Uh-

_{[YOUR SAVIOR seems lost for words for a moment. He's never noticed how yellow your eyes are before.]}

Well... Maybe we should... um... stand up. Or something.

_{[And is his face flushing?]}

A. ABSCOND with all due haste and probably SCREAMING.
B. Silence his EMBARRASSED STAMMERING with a LIP-LOCK.
C. Try to BRUSH IT OFF and explain this all as an ISOLATED INCIDENT and certainly not indicative of DEEPER FEELINGS.
D. You know what to do.

[Fuck you, OPTION D.]

>C. Try to BRUSH IT OFF and explain this is all as an ISOLATED INCIDENT and certainly not indicative of DEEPER FEELINGS.

[You shove against Garrus's ~~impressive~~ shoulderspan to get yourself to your feet with a bit of an awkward stand. Then you start to ramble about how FATE is just a bunch of BULLSHIT and this whole EMBARRASSING EPISODE was just an UNFORTUNATE TURN OF EVENTS, and YOUR BEHAVIOR certainly was not indicative of DEEPER FEELINGS!! It's not like you're protesting too much again, no way. This is totally seamless, even with that HIDEOUS MUTANT RED scattered across your colorless complexion. Similarly, you ignore THE FLUSH OF YOUR COMPANY, despite how distracting it is.

...but you offer a hand to your FALLEN SAVIOR. You are very sure to make NO EYE CONTACT and FROWN A LOT. You're not even really sure why you made this chivalrous offer. Of course, it's more GODMODING GAMEPLOT.]

I'm not thanking you or anything, you fucking heinously deplorable shithole. Okay? Let's just fucking get that out where everyone can see it so there's no fucking mystery befuddling our predicament, gogdamn.

_{[Your FALLEN SAVIOR accepts the CHIVALROUS OFFER, which boosts his EGO a bit. Of course he's also avoiding the dangerous EYE CONTACT. He's not frowning as much though. He's more muttering and glancing off toward the DISTANT CITYSCAPE as a mode of distraction.]}

You could thank me. I probably saved you from a cracked bone or something.

_{[Yeah. That's all it was.]}

You don't have to so damn rude either. I mean-

Look-

_{[More EMBARRASSED STAMMERING before he RECOVERS HIS BEARINGS.]}

Look, just forget it, alright? Try to do something nice and I end up in this whole stupid situation!

_{[It comes to both of your attentions that he has not yet released your hand. Huh.]}

A. FLIP THE FUCK OUT! (http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/dd77/Nicarius/icons/MSPA-flipthefuckouttext-1.gif)
B. SNATCH your hand back and MUTTER EXCUSES.
C. Leave it there. It's kind of nice.
D. No, no. Fuck Garrus.

_{[The fact that you're carrying on conversation with the game options seems worrying.]}

Well, m-maybe if you were fucking minding your own business, we wouldn't be...like this.

[In light of the fact that you are both basically HOLDING HANDS, your world ends for a second. There's a rush of IRRATIONAL ANGER AND ANXIETY and maybe some EXCITEMENT, all of which is very mysterious to you because you're NOT COMPLETELY IN CONTROL OF YOUR ACTIONS OR FEELINGS.

You consider just staying like this, but that's REALLY AWKWARD.]

[You withdraw so suddenly from holding Garrus's hand that you almost FALL ON YOUR ASS in an unsurprising display of your LACK OF GRACE. Your eyes are wide as if THIS WHOLE THING IS SUDDENLY DAWNING ON YOU, and you proceed to

>A. FLIP THE FUCK OUT! (http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/dd77/Nicarius/icons/MSPA-flipthefuckouttext-1.gif)

This fit is probably going to last for a while.]

_{[Garrus doesn't react a whole lot better - although he also doesn't fall backwards. He just jerks back like a startled rabbit and stares for a moment, apparently trying to process the fact that you were holding hands. The MOMENT gets even more awkward (not as awkward as your CROWNING MOMENT but still). I mean, the flailing and flipping the fuck out helps, but seriously man.

Jegus.

Garrus covers his face with his palm in a FACEPALM MANEUVER to express his exasperation.]}

I... Are you going to stop having a fit? Or should I just wait? Maybe we should talk....

A. That sounds reasonable. Stop FLIPPING THE FUCK OUT and TALK.
B. FUCK THAT KEEP FLIPPING OUT.
C. ABSCOND.
D. I'm not repeating myself.

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DATING SIM MEME

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